Young Marriage - Writing Request
Earlier in the week I talked about taking requests for topics to write about and the first response I good was a good one: Young Marriage.
Sara and I were both twenty nine when we got married, we'd been engaged for thirteen months, together for four and a half years and living together for that entire time minus maybe two weeks.
It didn't feel like we were getting married young to me and I think that is due to a number of things; both my siblings got married I think younger than I was but right around a similar age, it hadn't been a snap rash decision but something we had discussed and both knew we wanted and I'd known very early on in our relationship that Sara was the girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
But in the grand scheme of things, in this day and age, I guess getting married before your thirty is still considered fairly young. I definitely think that we are still young people who also happen to be married.
So what's it like I guess was the question at hand. Frankly, it's awesome. As I said, Sara and I lived together pretty much from jump street at first in a teeny tiny little one bed flat and for the past five years in our moderately small two bed rented house, so there really wasn't a lot that changed in that regard, there were no surprises or issues of needing our own space or anything like that. Hell, when we're at home together we're pretty much in the same room as each other most of the time. I think that comes from our time living in the flat, there wasn't enough space in there too be apart and it was never an issue as we would rather be in each others company. A bit over two years into marriage and that's never changed. We might be doing our own thing, Sara drawing or printing while I play video games or write or whatever, but we generally are in the same room doing that. We cook together, eat together, go bed at the same time unless one of us is working late or on the rare occasion out.
I'm sure that some people, probably a lot, find that suffocating but for us it works. It's a cliche but we are a team and we do prop each other up when needed.
We talk about everything but a lot of the time things are able to go relatively unsaid as we know each other so well that the other can most of the time intuit what is going it.
We want kids when the time is right and if that happened at any point we'd both be excited. Ideally we want to own our own house first and we have a few more places we'd like to travel before that but money is a pesky thing and gets in the way.
Marriage isn't for everyone though, it doesn't have to be. I've known couples who have been solid and together for years and years, have kids, have lives, everything, but aren't married and have no intention of getting married. Does that mean that they're not as strong a couple!? Absolutely not! I can't speak to that experience myself, but I respect it and think that if that is the way you want to go then all power to you.
There is also people who I would have told you a month ago were bound to get married and it would be sooner rather than later, but then that relationship ended, somewhat out of the blue for everyone (apart from the one who ended it presumably) and I think to myself, damn, that's really sad... But it could have been so much worse if instead of breaking it off then the person had tried to make it work just for longevities sake and they had got married. Those feelings of doubt might have gone, but they might not have and one day it would have come back up and caused a lot more hurt.
I don't really know if I answered the question or if there even was a question but I really liked the prompt as it gave me a lot to think about and then write about. Thanks to David Lafuente for the suggestion, follow him on twitter @srDAVIDLAFUENTE or check out any of his amazing comic book or art projects.
If you have a topic you would like me to write about tweet me @jhewlett and be sure to check back here daily for more nonsense and ramblings about all sorts of stuff.