Reviewing For Money
Not quite as cool as it sounds, I haven't landed a fun writing gig. Yet.
No, every week our favourite burger joint, 7Bone, picks out it's favourite review from the week and gives the writer a £25 voucher. I read one last week while... totally sober and not at all under the influence of any amount of beers. I thought to myself, "Pssh, I could write something better than that." I also thought, "Damn, I want a burger."
So I took to google and wrote them a glowing review.
Was it maybe a little hyperbolic and intended to grab their attention to win me a voucher? Absolutely, I have no shame, I will shill for any product I actually believe in.
But thats the key, sure I maybe laid it on a little thick but nothing in there is untrue. I stand by every word. They ARE the best burgers in the world, in my opinion.
So without further adieu I give you my prize winning review.
Oh yeah, I won this weeks voucher. I realise I hadn't said that yet.
I have been a huge fan of 7Bone since they first opened and have told everyone I can that they have THE best burgers available.
My wife and I have made an effort to find a better burger all around the world; we first tried London, we made special trips from Southampton specifically to check out some of the highly regarded burger joints up there. Some of them were very good, maybe even as good once or twice. But they cannot equal the consistently perfect quality of a 7Bone beef patty.
So we went to Texas, the home of beef. Where they will have you believe the original cow was born, reared, slaughtered, minced and made into a delicious burger. And they were pretty good. But were they as good as good as Prince Charles Is Overated!? Nope. Not even close. Stick to barbecue Texas, your burgers ain’t got jack on the guys in Southampton.
Then we went to Hawaii, where we had been told of a special herd of walking burgers on the big island. The waygu burgers were nice, but they were nothing compared to a Peter Green.
You’re a series of islands, you got poke, don’t get get greedy.
We’ve had burgers in Budapest, but I’d rather have a Robert Johnson.
Croatia is really nice, but not as nice as Shuffle To Straight Time.
And I tell you what, you can’t get a Triple-B there... so there’s only so long I could stay in Hong Kong.
7Bone Burger Co. have THE best burgers in the world. I am happy to take on competitors and tell you exactly why they’re not as good.