A Week Without A Drink
I've had week. It's been pretty rough and while it is most certainly better now than it was at the start of the week it's definitely not fixed and all better.
Between Sunday and Wednesday I think I slept a total of three hour. The strange part is I knew I could have gotten more sleep if I'd just had a drink or two, but I didn't.
I haven't had a drop since last Sunday when I had one beer with lunch at the pub and then one can of Bud Lite that I had while watching football. I had had plenty to drink last Saturday night though, while watching The Force Awakens as you may have read about.
I decided on Sunday that I wanted to handle this whole situation sober as I knew how easy it would be to just drink away everything and either pretend nothing was going on, or get lazy and not do anything to help fix it, or just flat out make it worse.
I stand by the fact that I by no means have a drinking problem, I enjoy a drink and I occasionally I enjoy letting loose and getting a bit drunk, but for me mostly it's like a lot of things; I'm a beer nerd, I enjoy trying new beers, tasting different flavours and styles and finding ones I really really enjoy. It's no different to foodies or people who are into anything specific.
But I also am not oblivious to the fact that I have a predisposition for enjoying alcohol. We all do in my family to various degrees, and because I've seen how easily it can become a problem, watching my brother (who's coming up on three years of sobriety by the way, so good for him!) I try not to lean on it as a crutch.
That's why I've stayed sober this week.
I've even had beers in the fridge, I've been quite proud of the fact that despite having the temptation at my finger tips at any point I've not gone for them once. Same when I went out the other evening, I don't think I've ever had a soft drink in BrewDog before but I still enjoyed the place just as much despite not drinking.
Now, I'm not doing anything crazy like saying that's it never drinking again, god no. I'm actually really looking forward to cracking open a cold one. Will that be tomorrow? Maybe. Will it be next week? I imagine it's quite likely. But what I'm doing and what I'm saying to myself, and what I'm writing and publishing here so I can stay accountable for it, is that I'm only going to drink in social situations now. I don't think it'll be too hard to stick to that if I've managed to all this week.
I realised while writing this that it sounds like me drinking has been a problem and something that has contributed to what's been going on. It isn't, hasn't and has nothing to do with any of it. Honestly. It just so happens that I decided, when everything started coming up, that I wasn't going to drink to get through it. Other then that it has nothing to do with it.
What else have I been up to today? Well, I kept the house tidy, it's really easy to do when it's already clean.
I cleaned myself up a bit, tiding up the beard and trimming everything else. I'm still letting the beard grow out a bit at the moment as my hair is getting longer and it looks weird when my beard is short but my hair is long.
I had some laundry and stuff to do which is currently drying in the spare room, but once that's done I have a plan for tomorrow. I'm going to sort out everything thats on the floor in there. The room is clean now, but there is one corner that has built up quite a bit of just... stuff. Things that could be filed away, boxed up, put back on relevant shelves, stored away in the loft, that kind of thing. So I'm going to do that tomorrow I think.