• James Hewlett

Community Family. Keep Moving Forward, Together.

I don’t really want to write anything today. I talked the other day about the hurt that’s being felt amongst the Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus community right now and I’m not going to lie it’s really hitting me hard.

A few weeks ago I was really low. I’m feeling a lot better now but this has been a blow, it’s definitely a different kind of low feeling and I know it’ll pass but it just sucks.

It’s a weird thing to say but knowing I’m not alone in my hurt is helping, the RT community really is incredible and like a family. They can squabble and be mean and disagree at times but when it matters they come together and support each other better than anyone else can.

I have Rooster Teeth and Achievement Hunter content on for the majority of the time I am at home and awake each day. That’s not an exaggeration. I watch it when I am working out, I’ll listen to it while I cook, I’ll have it on in the background while I’m playing a game. It’s my go to in every situation and has been for a long time.

When my life was at its lowest they were there keeping me going. For a group that primarily focuses on comedy they’re not afraid to break it down and get real when they need to and I’ve always appreciated that about them too. I have learned a lot and become the person I am today based in part on being a member of that community and in that audience.

That’s why this all hurts so much right now.

But I’m not alone in my hurting. I’m not all over the message boards or Twitter or even Reddit a whole lot, though I’ll post stuff from time to time, but I have a few really close friends who are passionate and plugged in to the community as well. We’re almost our own little sect and will always talk about the goings on for good or ill. Doing that at the moment has been essential for me. I’ve been able to process my feelings, bounce things off them, listen to them and keep moving forward together. They know who they are and they know how much I love them.

My initial reaction is always, ‘James what the fuck man these are strangers and internet content creators, why are you letting this affect you so much? Get over it.’ And I’m sure to an outside perspective that is how it would look. Hell I would probably think the same if the situation was flipped.

I have to keep reminding myself that grief isn’t just for death, it is about loss and the things we assign importance to, that we grieve for, are ours and ours alone to decide. Often we don’t even realise that we have assigned such significance to a thing until something happens. The important thing I keep having to remind myself is that it is okay to keep like this, that it is important to in order to process and move forward.

I’ve read some amazing things from members of the community today and it has really helped. I started this post with the intention of doing a, ‘hey I’m taking the night off tonight and here’s why’ post and it turned into this and with me crying again. I don’t have a way of ending it. I’m alright. I’ll be alright and I hope everyone else hurting right now will be too.

Keep moving forward.


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